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Phil Spector's Hair Absorbs SkyNet
Dateline Los Angeles, CA - April 26, 2006
Mark the time: At 2:14pm Pacific time, April 26th, Phil Spector's
hair became self-aware. Just moments after the judge announced a
delay in the start of his murder trial, Spector's hair gained
consciousness, and began absorbing nearby electronic gadgets. It
began with the numerous cellphones in the area, and was still
gathering strength as Spector was dragged out of the courtroom
admist terrified crowds of onlookers.
The latest update available is that Spector's hair was sighted at
Universal Studios, where it had absorbed the T2:3D ride. The
National Guard has been called in to monitor the growth of Spector's
hair, in case it should at any time endanger national security.
When asked to comment on the situation, National Guard spokesman
Lt. John Conner commented, "We do not believe Mr. Spector's hair
has hostile intents at this time. However, there is probably not
much we could do if it did. I'm only a reservist. I've never
even fired a rifle."
One can only hope that Spector's hair doesn't begin popping forth
cyborg units bent on eliminating the human race.
For WNN this is Liqui D'metal reporting.
seen this boy?
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Last Updated: February 12, 2012 Copyright 2012 - Infinity, Waldo News Network. All Rights Reserved.
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